Can a First-Time Player Survive in Terraria?

Can a First-Time Player Survive in Terraria?

Yep, you read that right. I have never played Terraria. Not once. Growing up, it always felt like there was two types of people. The ones who played Minecraft and the ones who played Terraria. I was firmly on Team Minecraft. I mean, I still play to this day. But I’ve always had this itch in the back of my mind to just pick up Terraria and finally see what the hype is all about. But I’m not just going to hop in, slap together some sad little dirt hut, and call it a day. No, I’m going to give Terraria the full experience. I’m talking about building the most unnecessary castle for my first base, gathering some gear, and exploring this absolute fever dream of a 2D world. And for the best part, I want to see if a complete noob like me can somehow take down the first boss, the Eye of Cthulhu. All to answer one big question. Is Terraria actually better than Minecraft? Well, I guess there’s only one way to find out. So, I booted up my game, made my character look like a full-on wizard, and gave him the baldest head I could possibly find. Bro, this man got the robe on with the slippers. You see that? I’m going with this, bro. I’m going with this. I’m going to do large. And uh I’m going just do classic because I don’t want to die on the first night. After what felt like an eternity of loading, I finally spawned in. And that’s when I met my first friend, Scott. Holy moly. We are in, boys. Look at this. This looks crazy. Oh, who’s this guy? Oh, look. This is Scott. They say there is a person who will tell you how to survive in this land. Oh, wait. That’s me. Uh, I don’t need your help, man. I don’t need your help killing this rabbit. How do I craft, Scott? Tell me how to craft. All right. This is so confusing. What am I looking at? What is any of this stuff? Okay, so this is my inventory and this is my crafting right here. Oh, I did it. Oh, I did it. I did it. Yo, I made a helmet. How do I put it on? Oh, no. No. I don’t like that. No, no, no. Take that off. I need my bald head to shine. Scott also suggested that I should build a house before nightfall. Sounds easy enough. Okay, we can build right here, Scott. Okay, Scott likes the forest. All right, let’s start building a house real quick. Oh, there we go. Look what I’m doing. I got a floor, boys. Oh, let’s go. I’m doing something. I don’t know what I’m doing. All right, we need some torches in here. Holy crap, it’s dark. Look at that. I’m just going to block ourselves up. Oh, I did it. No, they’re coming. No, they’re coming in. Oh, shoot. Can I place a door here? Why can’t I place a door? Oh my lord. Brother in Christ. What is the secret? Scott, I need you to just give me like two seconds, Scott. All right, I can I got to get this torch. Why is he so strong, bro? This man is so bulky. I need that torch. Come on. Come on. I’m [ __ ] spamming this [ __ ] bro. Die, [ __ ] Die. Ball greatness. Look at this guy. Look what I got. Whoa. Whoa. Yo, bro. Bro, Scott, what is that? What is that, Scott? No, no, no, no, no, no. The [ __ ] eyeball. I can’t see. We got to kill that eyeball. This eyeball is pissing me off. I don’t like it. Oh, you lucky bastard. How to place a door in Terraria? Cuz I don’t know how to place a door. Doors are three blocks tall. Oh, wait. I should be able to place it, right? Oh, I did it. I did it, boys. Look what I did. I got a door. But I’m not making a door for these guys. [ __ ] that. They’re going to kill me. There wasn’t much me and Scott can do in this situation, even if we wanted to. So, I just started digging. Yep. Mining stone under my house like a scared little mole. Just trying to kill some time until sunrise so I can actually hit the real M, boys. Oh, it’s daytime, I think. Oh, it’s daytime. Let’s go. Okay, let’s get out of here. Uh, torches. Do I have torches? Where’s my torches? Oh, are we in, boys? I don’t think there’s spiders in this game, right? Oh, shoot. I found something. Oh my god, there’s pots. Pots everywhere. What the hell? Uh, we just keep going down, I guess. What the [ __ ] is that? There’s a [ __ ] No. Oh [ __ ] Oh [ __ ]
Get your ass back here.
My bad, bro. My bad. My bad. What? What did I complete? Helophobia. Helophobia. There’s a helicopter. Crazy part is all this loot is mines now. Yo, this is mad sketchy, bro. Oh my god. There’s like little slime balls everywhere. Oh [ __ ] Oh no. No. Almost killed myself right there. Holy moly. Yo, what is that? It’s like a little crystal. A life crystal. I’m going to have to use Wiki for this cuz I don’t know what any of this stuff means. Wait, how do I use it though? I have this uh this life orb. Ooh, it healed me. Oh, nice. What the What is going on? I’m going up. I’m going up. I don’t know what’s going on. I don’t know what’s going on. Get me up, bro. Build, build, build. I’ll fight you. I’ll fight you. I dare you. Show yourself, mother. Come here. I got to get him. Oh. Oh, I got it. Oh, what the hell was that thing, dude? Like a worm. Yo, I I got so nervous cuz all I hear is it’s like a dog. I still had no idea what that thing even was. A dog worm. Wormy dog. I don’t even know at this point. I returned to my house and used everything I collected to craft the essentials. A furnace, a chest, and an anvil. Oh, I can make a furnace, bro. Wait. Yo, I’m cooking. I can make bowls and stuff, but I can’t make stone gear, which is weird. Okay, so now that I have lead and I guess tint tint bars, I can make a chest. Look at that, boys. Your boy got a chest, which I’m going to place right here. Until I realize I pretty much just burned through all my materials. And it looks like I’m going to have to go back to the mines. Yes, sir. I do need more. I need some iron. I need something. Honestly, I need to get off of copper tools. And I have to make my way to iron tools. Can’t really see a thing in here, though, which sucks. Oh my god, it’s a chest. I found some chest, boys. And my uh little pottery pots, I think. Oh, I got arrows. I got bars. Oh, I got grenades. Your boy got grenades. Got to love that. All right, we got to go down, boys. This bald head needs some gear. Also, I think I stopped here because there were just the worm. The worm guy was here. Hey, yellow guy. Maybe I should make a crafting bench real quick. I should do that. I’m gonna upgrade my gear. Get ourselves some wooden pants as well. Bro, these guys are fing to kill me. Holy [ __ ] Oh, let’s get this up here. See that? Look at that silver. Oh, we got silver, boys. Let’s go. I found silver. I get a silver pickaxe. I’m kind of disappointed that I never really tried this game when I was a kid. It’s pretty fun. Also, I think just me playing by myself and just figuring out the game just like as I go on makes it 10 times better than playing with people that are just well more experienced than me. And for me, it’s kind of just like a little bit of a challenge because I have no idea what’s going on, man. I’m just a bald dude in a cave. That’s all I am. Oh, shoot. They’re having a boxing fight right there. You see that [ __ ] Look at that [ __ ] As a kid, I yearn for the mines. Your boy found more silver. More silver for me. That is a yellow slime. Yellow slime. I don’t really see anything over there. So, we’re going to go home. We did pretty good today, boys. Got some silver, some some good stuff. Got the goodies. And I wasn’t wrong about the goodies because when I got back home, it felt like I could literally craft anything I wanted. Buckets, cooking pots, and get this, even a gorgeous set of toilets. Is that a toilet? Apparently, we can use a toilet. That’s nice. Can you stop opening this [ __ ] door, bro? We need a lock for this stuff. Don’t even Don’t open it. Don’t open it. You know, you’re supposed to be the one that’s helping me. This is my first time playing. I kind of want to test out my bow and arrow, too. Oh. Oh, no. There’s Yeah. Close the door. Close the door. All right. We got lead. Can we make silver stuff? Oh, we could make silver stuff. Oh, look at this silver armor. I need some silver. But I like my bald head, man. I love my bald head. Holy crap. That How much silver was that? Yo, that was so much silver. Where’s some damn pants? Oh [ __ ] We got to go back to the mines, boys. Oh, it tells you right here. Oh, it would take six ingots. Well, six tin to make that. Oh, okay. But I couldn’t let that set back get to me because honestly, I had way bigger problems than just my pants. My house. Yeah, it was looking pretty rough, tiny, cramped. Basically, a shoe box of walls, bro. And if I want to build my castle as my first starter house, I’m going to need a lot of stone. Like a lot. So, you already know what time it is.
Cue the montage. [Music] All right, bald man is back. All right, so this is what I got so far. I’m trying to build sort of like a medieval castle. It’s kind of hard to do it in 2D. It’s really difficult and I’m trying to make it work. I mean, yeah, it did look like straight hot garbage right now. But did I care? No, not really. Trust me, this is going to be the perfect starter castle. It just needs a little bit of love. But I also still needed a lot of [ __ ] stone. And instead of going back to my sad little molehill under my shed, I decided to head west to find a real cave. And let me tell you, it did not disappoint. I was mining stone, picking up random shiny things like platinum and amethyst. Oh, is this just amethyst? Oh, yeah. It’s just amethyst. Nice. Uh, what’s that? That got to be silver, right? Yep. Found some silver, boys. Got some silver. Look at all the little worms. They’re just jumping everywhere. Here we go, boys. Wormy’s here. Wormy, come out, Wormy. Let’s go. I heard you, Wormy. I heard you. But anyways, uh, let me just move by, Mr. Jellyfish. What is this? Is this silver platinum? Oh, boys, we found some platinum. Aside from getting shot at a couple times, the mining trip was going pretty well. But on the way out, I stumbled across this this weird stone altar thing. We found some tin as well. That’s also good, bro. But what is that thing? I found all these cool like ores and stuff. I still can’t figure out what these two things are. That looks like a statue, but that thing looks like it wants to eat me. So, I’m not even going to try to mess with it, bro. What is this, though? Oh, it’s an angel statue. So, what’s this? At first, I thought it was just background decoration, but no, it’s very much alive. Look, it’s shooting bubbles. It shoots bubbles. What did it do exactly? Uh, I have no clue. And I wasn’t about to find out with my inventory stuffed to the brim. So, I grabbed all my stuff, ran right back home, and just made a mental bookmark to remind myself to come back to this later. [Music] All right, we’re back. Okay, real quick. How’s our boy Scott doing? Hello, Scott. Nice to meet you, partner. Damn, it will take 10. God damn. How much is the armor? 25. Jesus. I don’t even think I have that much. Oh, I do. I have 26. Let’s get ourselves some lead armor. Damn, look at that, bro. Come on. You can’t tell me this doesn’t look fire. Okay, maybe I should make a different sword cuz this sword is garbage. Holy crap. You know what? I changed my mind. I’m making a sword. This sword is garbage. It’s boo boo cheeks. Silver. silver. Boom. Look at that. We have a silver sword and a pickaxe. Very fast. Ooh, bro. This sword is going crazy. I love this sword already, bro. Anyways, let’s uh let’s go out, bro. Let’s go exploring. All right, we are back to the mines, boys. Back to the mines. Got to find a different cave, bro. I need some more gear. I need some stuff. Oh, we going deep, bro. God damn. What the hell is going on? It’s a lot of mining I’m doing, but I really need it. No, there are spiders in this game. No, there are spiders. No. Oh my god. It was good while I lasted. I guess I was going through this whole play through. I’m just like, yo, there’s no spiders or nothing. This This is so peaceful. Oh, that’s not good. That’s not good, boys. We got wall crawlers. We got [ __ ] slimes and whatever the hell that is. Let’s see what this is all about, boys. We got like a statue right here. Suspicious looking eye and a magic mirror. Don’t know what that is, but I I’ll take it. Also, I didn’t know this was like some uh apparently this is like a spider cave. So, let’s see what we got from that. We got the king statue. Got a sunflower. That’s definitely not a sunflower. That’s a painting. We got dynamites, a magic mirror, and a suspicious looking eye. Summon the eye of Cthulhu. Oh, okay. Okay. I think we got it. Okay. Wait, wait, wait, wait. I Wait. This is just spiders. Why do I Why? No. What am I doing? I don’t want to go down there. Oh, screw that, bro. Hell no. I ain’t messing with those guys, bro. I’m not messing with them. I’ll come back when I have armor. Screw that. Plus, I got too much good stuff on me right now, and I don’t even know where I’m at. Out of everything I hauled back, there was one thing that grabbed my attention more than anything else. The eye. I couldn’t shake this feeling that this suspicious looking eye was connected to that eerie altar I found earlier. Of course, curiosity got the best of me, so I went back. So, we have the eye for it. But I have a feeling it’s something more that we have to do than just, you know, eating the eye or whatever. And before I go home, I want to make sure I get this because I feel like this is important. And I feel like I’m going to forget about it if I don’t. Went over here. Where the hell is it? I think that’s going to be the hardest part trying to just find this thing cuz I’m I haven’t been here in a while. Oh, there it is. Okay, so what if I get that little suspicious eye thing? I do this. [Applause] [Music] Wait, what? What just what what what? Get out of here. We got to run. We got to run. We got to get out of here. The eye of Cthulhu. Oh no. Can it like go through walls or something? Oh my god. It’s chasing me. And if it goes through walls, that’s not fair. It’s blocking my only way out. Got to run. Got to just run. No. God damn it.
Mission failed. We’ll get out next time.
God damn it, bro. I didn’t know it was some of it. blah blah blah.
Okay.
God damn, that was a big [ __ ] stutter. Uh, let’s see. Okay, so we lost the eye. So, I’m assuming we got to go find another one to summon the eye of Cthulhu. I don’t know, Brian. For now, I’m going just finish my house and then um we got to go find another eye. Okay, so maybe I did burn my one and only eye summons and got dunked all in two seconds. But plot twist, I didn’t have to crawl through those spiderinfested caves to get another one. See, I was on a call with my friends Mist and Ultima, and they hit me with the ultimate wisdom. Bro, just buy another one. And you know what? They were right. I got to upgrade my gear cuz I’m trying to go back to get like an eye again. Actually, no. I don’t, like you said, I don’t think I need that cuz I have You have three lenses.
I got more than that, but I haven’t seen like the actual eyeball.
I think it’s just six lenses. I don’t think you need an eyeball. Maybe I’m geeking now. You should just be able to craft them together into an eye at the uh the demon alter that you were at where you summon the eye in the first place.
Oh, I got to go back over there.
Yeah, that’s where you make boss spawns.
Oh, I see it. I see it. Yeah, I got it. Let’s go. Sick.
I got to be careful. Wait, I’m putting this in my inventory like all the way in the back. Kobe. Kobe. A chest. [ __ ] out the way. My [ __ ] loop, [ __ ] What’ I get? What’ I get? Got some [ __ ] shoes, bro. And I’m in a ditch. Not that [ __ ] bastard. All right, I’m never going back there. But hey, we got a second eye. And now that gave me some time to focus on what really matters. Finally finishing off my castle and maybe actually knowing how to wear my armor the right way. Not in the vanity slot, bro. 49 silver bars. I got eight platinum.
Whose armor is on the vanity slot?
Oh my god. Is it? Oh my god. Put your armor on the right slot. Oh,
the one on the right. Put your armor on the Yeah.
Oh, so this whole time I just been wearing for looks.
Yeah.
Oh [ __ ] No, no. Yeah, just overthrow it. Yeah. Oh, okay. Never mind. So, I threw on my shiny new armor and went back to working on my castle, which by the end kind of looked like a frog. Totally unintentional, but I’m going just roll with it. During this time, Miss and Ultima were still on the call. And since they were probably bored or possibly just wanted to witness the chaos firsthand, they agreed to help me take down the Eye of Cthulhu once and for all. Oh, miss, you’re in.
Uh, buddy, where you at? Oh, my boy. What’s going on? But then we hit a problem. We were poor.
Damn, bro. We We are poor. I used all your damn silver. I’m going to keep it 100.
What do you used it on?
Uh, helmet and sword.
Okay, that’s fine. I had just enough ores to craft a full suit of armor for myself and outfitting two more people. Yeah, that wasn’t going to happen, man. So, we had to hit the mines one last time. But this time, Miss and Ultima said they wanted to make it special. I didn’t know what they meant by that. And to be honest, it it kind of just sounded like a trap, but I will trust their judgment.
I forgot that the rope didn’t go all the way down. Uhoh. That’s not good.
Oh my god. Ultima. Oh, I’ll follow you. Do you got [ __ ] shurikens or something? Yeah, I still shurikens.
Oh, shoot. I should have used those for these guys.
Oh, wait. Grab this. I’ll grab this first in the chest. You want this? It’s like a
the web slinger.
Then right click it.
Oopsies. In your inventory. And then I think press uh E.
E. Oh, that’s sick. Oh no, they’re back. The spiders.
That biome is dangerous, so just infinitely spawn.
Oh, this biome.
Yeah.
Oh, they’re jumping everywhere. [ __ ] [ __ ] Oh, I gotta go. I’m sorry. Yo, there was like three. Three or four. I don’t know. I just dipped. I was on one heart. Why didn’t it miss? Thought he could fly. Oh, there’s treasure. Thanks, miss. Of course.
Thank you.
I’m so bad with ropes, bro. I’ve never had to do this before. What was the thought process behind that?
Also, you’re still there?
Yeah, I’m still here.
What the hell? They haven’t killed you yet.
No.
Uh, you see that glowing ore under you? Can you get that? Oh, and you’re going down now. Holy [ __ ] you’re [ __ ] Well, thanks for draining the [ __ ] water.
Did you waste the potion? Oh, no. Yeah, he opened a trap chest. I thought you were going to drown or you exploded. There’s a crazy seed, by the way.
The seed.
Good. Crazy or bad crazy?
Good crazy.
Well, if you want to know, the seed is Playboy Cardi.
Is it dead ass? Yes, it’s Playboy Cardi. Yeah, Playboy Cardi.
My favorite seed. Every time I just say, just think about it. Just a bucket video. I love you, Cotti. [Music] You’re my favorite rapper in the world, man. So much me. Oh, there’s a pinky. Wow. Oh, in the chest. Why would you do that? You knew that would happen. Oh, look at platinum. Oh, that’s a bomb.
Let’s go to the right a little bit,
bro. My bad.
Oh my. Whoever just dropped a billion pounds of water on me, I hate you.
My bad. I saw platinum and I geeked out, bro. I don’t even know how I went down there.
You just did it with
Oh, I almost died right there again. What the Oh my god, that was terrifying. What?
The rope. It just disconnected for a little bit. Then it reconnected. Yo, there’s mine carts and tracks and stuff. Dude, there’s just a big gap in this rope and I’m scared. So, I don’t have any more rope.
I’m going to die.
Where the hell did he come from?
Oh my.
Wow. I’m on the ceiling of hell right now. Oh [ __ ] Wait, there’s a dungeon right there. Perfect
dungeon.
Even though we don’t have the keys, but wait. Wait, that’s lava. I didn’t realize that was lava right there. Oh my god. I almost just mine straight into it. It’s getting sticky.
I’m scared, bro. I’m scared, bro. I’m scared. Wait, do I just jump down?
Get my
Oh, welcome to hell, buddy.
Thanks, man. I love it already.
This is the best place in the game. Does anybody got any fire resistance? No. Well, guess we’re not getting hell stone. Oh, wait. No, it’s right here.
Oh, I’m going to die. So, after literally going to the pits of hell with these two idiots and dying more times than I can count, we finally made it back to the surface with the good stuff. I mostly just upgraded my sword and axe while Miss and Ultima were making all kinds of crazy gear and [ __ ] that I don’t even understand to this day. Yo, it’s Keemstar.
Okay, bro.
Yeah. Is that the gnome you saw at the He was outside.
Yeah. Yeah. The one you [ __ ] killed.
No, I didn’t kill him. He was trying to kill me, bro. He was trying to kill me the first day I got here. Wait. Oh, we got
Yo, we got Humphre.
Hello, Humphrey. Wow, you [ __ ] suck, Humphrey.
What do you mean? Wait, let me see. Uh, he got potions, copper tools, and bug nets.
You want a bug net, dude? Hand me that [ __ ] That’s mine. That’s mine. That’s mine. 89 silver for a damn piggy bank. Are you serious? This man must be smoking crack. Smoking crack. Oh my god, it’s a goldfish. What the Yo. All right. Are you guys ready?
I’m pretty freaking ready, dude. Are you ready, Ultima? I’m ready now.
Okay, give me a second. I got to take a piss.
It’s freaking dude. Dude,
has to be night time.
No, [ __ ] it does.
Does he? No.
No, probably not. Whoa, it’s raining hard. What the [ __ ] did I come back to?
What’s happening? What’s happening? We’re about to fight the Eye of Cthulhu. All right, here we go.
Three, two, one, go. Wait, bro. It ain’t working.
Has to be night time. Yeah,
I knew that.
Yeah. All right. All right, bro. I’m going back inside, bro. It’s pitch black outside. Ultima, can you spawn in? Oh, never mind. Oh [ __ ] Wait. From the left. Watch out, bro.
From the left. Oh, there he is. He’s targeting me. Oh. Oh, I’m doing so much. I’m doing some damage. Damn, you guys are killing this guy. Holy, dude. We’re melting him. I’m scared. I’m scared for this phase, though.
Oh, I’ll help you out.
None of us even have Hermes boots, so we can’t even like outrun him.
Yeah.
Oh, holy crap.
He’s in the boss fight of my life. Oh, let’s go. Let’s go. Okay, real quick. Can I borrow one of your guys’ weapons?
I have my boomerang. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Take his boomerang real quick.
I want to try to take it on by myself. You guys can just watch.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Go, go, go.
All right. I’m doing it again. Let’s go. All right. Where is he?
Oh, no.
Where is he? Oh, shoot. Oh, he’s right. Oh, no. Oh my god. I can’t even outrun this guy. Holy crap. Oh [ __ ] I’m going to die to this guy already. Why? You got that easy. And if I die, he just uh he just despawns, right? No, cuz we’re alive.
Is this boomerang even doing damage to him? Oh, it is. Oh, I Okay. Okay. I’m starting to get used to it. I I’m not sure how I’m going to react when he goes to his second phase. This is going to be 10 times faster. Oh, that is so much. Hold on. I got I got it. I believe in you, Junior.
I got this, bro. I’m cooking. I’m cooking right now. Oh, I’m Why am I hitting with a pickaxe? What the [ __ ] Oh, I’m going to die to him. I’m going to die. I’m going to die. I got you. There you go, bud. Just one hit.
Yeah. Thanks. Thanks. Thanks. Thanks. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh. Oh my god. You’re fine. You’re chilling.
I’m doing I’m doing all right. I’m doing all right. I’m doing all right. Oh, come on. Jesus.
You only got 200 health. You got it. Easy. Oh [ __ ] Come on. Come on. Oh, I’m on two hearts.
Don’t get greedy. Don’t get greedy.
I’m on two hearts. Oh, wait. Is that aggro on you now?
[ __ ] did I do?
I got him. Oh,
yeah. Hit him. Let’s go.
[ __ ]
Thanks, miss. Let’s go, baby. Uh, what did I even get for that? I don’t think I got anything good. We got demonite.
Oh, I have a I have 119 demonite ore.
Peak. Did you have fun, Junior?
I did. I did have a lot of fun. This game’s good.

I apologize in advance for making you watch an idiot (me)
After seeing this game on the market for 10+ years, I finally decided to play Terraria for the first time and It wasn’t what I expected. Sorry for being an idiot But hey, at least you can enjoy my suffering 🙂

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