Minecraft But I SURVIVE in RAP CIVILIZATION [FULL MOVIE]

Minecraft But I SURVIVE in RAP CIVILIZATION [FULL MOVIE]

[Music] This is me stuck in a field mining dirt for the hundth day in a row. I’m a voiceless around here. If you can’t rap, you’re not allowed to speak. Welcome to rap civilization. Rapping is everything. The better you rap, the more followers you get. Whoever has the most followers is the rap king. Kanye Chess has over a million followers. He decides who raps and who rots. All I need is one rhyme. One line that hits and I become a rapper. Until then, I’m stuck down here breaking dirt for scraps like every other voiceless. Every morning, we grab a wooden pickaxe and swing till it breaks. And today, I need to finish fast. There’s a rap battle tonight and I can’t miss it. Watching rap battles is my favorite thing to do. It energizes me. I really hope I’m not too late to this rap battle. It’s Lil Uzi Dirt versus Travis Block. Two legends. If you look at my follower book, you can see that Lil Uzi Dirt is in second place and Travis Block is in fourth place. And see the dude in first place, Kanye Chest. He’s the rap king. Nobody dares to challenge Kanye to a rap battle because losing to him would make you a social reject. Okay, now that I turned in my dirt and coal, let’s see this rap battle. What an incredible show so far. Ladies and gentlemen, this is the tiebreaker round. Both rappers have won two rounds. Next round wins. Loosy Dirt, you go first. Dang it, I missed almost the whole show. What’s up my people? I’m the second most famous rapper in the world. And this punk ain’t going to change a thing. Name Zizzy Dirt. Everybody know me, bro. Find a shirt. You’re looking real bony. You don’t want the smoke. You allergic me. Every bar I spit, I got you nervous. Low key. Another easy win. Just another trophy. You dropped one track, now you acting like you know me. Boy, I’m at the top and you always be below me. The name Zuzie Dirt, but I’m in the sky floating. You trying to chase fame, already lost it. Your song’s garbage. Make me want to vomit. I ain’t being mean. Nah, I’m just being honest. Acting like a star. You ain’t even a comet. Let’s hear it for a little Uzi D. Phenomenal performance from him. Now, time to hear the underdog’s last bars. Take it away, Travis Block. Can you people believe he’s the second top rapper in the world? My grandma can rap better than him. Let’s get it. I know you ain’t no Sherlock cuz you ain’t got a clue, dude. Your rap’s straight sewage. Yeah, I’m talking doodoo. If this was PvP, I’d grab a bow and shoot you. Pew pew. I’m off the rails like choo choo. You think you’re too hot? Nah, I think you’re too fake. I’ll show you who’s a boss. Get you tied up like a shoelace. Thought this would be easy. Sorry, dude. Too late. You used to have bars, but you made it to your due date. Coming for the top. Better find a new lane. Boy, I’m Travis block. My vision clear like Blu-ray. I got you all mixed up like a cup of Kool-Aid. Now you just a joke. Call you Lil Uzi Foolane. [Music] This may have been one of the most intense rap battles in rap history. I know who I think should win, but the judges make the final decision. Judges, I choose Little Uzi Debt. Nah, fam. Travis block for sure. It was a close fight, but Travis Block wins. He’s the next big thing. You heard it, folks. Travis Block is the winner. What do you have to say for yourself, Travis? Shout out to all my followers. Y’all know what’s up. I’ll be the new rap king. Just wait till you see what I cook up. Wow, that was amazing. Travis is going to gain so many followers from that win. He’s going from the bottom to the top. And now I know it’s possible. Kanye Chest has been rap king for a long time. Nobody has been able to get more followers than him. Maybe Travis Block has what it takes. Oh my gosh, that’s Travis. He’s walking close to me. I’m voiceless, so I’m not allowed to talk, but I want to congratulate him. I’m sure nobody will notice if I just say a few words. Travis. Hey, I’m a big fan. Congrats, bro. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Did a voiceless just talk to me, fam? Bro, that’s disgusting. Guard, get this dirt block out of here. Come with me. One more word and you’re done. I’m doomed. Why did I even try to talk? So stupid of me. And I can’t believe Travis Block treated me like that. He seems so cool on camera. Now I know that he’s just a big fat jerk. I don’t know what’s going to happen to me. You’re lucky I’m the one who caught you. Any other guard would have tossed you in the pit. You better never speak in public again. What? Why are you helping me? I was a voiceless once, too. I still remember the line that changed everything for me. The system needs to be changed. and you seem like you know how to change it. Say this when no one’s listening. Say it like you mean it. Now get out of here. Oh. Uh, thank you, sir. You just saved my life. I owe you one. I should be in the pit right now. Why would a guard help me? And what even is this book? I’m going to check it out right when I get home. But this was a crazy day. I’m ready to be home safe and sound. I am never going to try to speak in public again. That was a big mistake. Home sweet home. Now I got to see what this guard gave me. Even in the dirt, I spit fire like a furnace. What does that even mean? Even in the dirt, I spit fire like a furnace. It sounds kind of cool, but what’s the point? I’m not a rapper. This is stupid. I got to go to bed. Yo yo, voiceless. You got to rhyme today or what, dog? Even in the dirt, I uh spit fire like the furnace. I’m voiceless. That sucks worse than usual, dog. You trash. go to the dirt field. Like I said before, the voiceless aren’t allowed to talk. But every morning, a guard gives us one chance to rap. If we spit a good bar, we become a rapper. But usually, the guards just make fun of us and call us trash. It’s pretty humiliating. I don’t care about having a fancy mansion or riches. I just want to feel like I have a purpose, like I’m not just some tool digging dirt every single day. Coal, coal, coal. Every single day, same dirt, same job. Do people even see us voiceless as humans? Coal in the dirt. This job is the worst. I’m cursed. Wait, did did I just rhyme? What was that? Did I just get my first follower? Who Who is that? I’ve never seen her before. She must be my first follower. I wish I could tell her thank you. But that one line doesn’t make me a rapper. It was probably just a fluke. Rappers can rap on command, not get lucky with one bar. It’s like I almost hear a beat in my head. Is this how all rappers feel? And how did that guard’s line help me out so much? You know what? It doesn’t matter. I got to keep practicing. Mine three, Cole. Almost a four. Then after that, I just need one more. Yeah, bro. I’m derp the cake. When I get home, I’ll eat some steak. No way I’m thinking of all this. I’m surprising myself with these bars. Now, tomorrow when the guard tries to humiliate me, I’m going to prove myself. Yo, voiceless geek. Time for me to cringe at your attempt at rhyming again. Okay, here we go. Calling me a geek. You’re the geekiest guard. Take a look at your nose. It’s freaky and large. Oh, boosted. [Music] What the How’d you manage to think of that? Because I’m a real rapper. Don’t you dare try to diss me ever again. Or else what? or else I’ll humiliate you in a rap battle. Now take me to my new home. Dang. Okay, I can talk out loud. This feels great. I feel proud. This is my fate. This kid is crazy. Excuse me. Still disrespecting me. So be it. Me and you. Rap battle tonight. You don’t want to rap battle me, bro. I’ll rip you to shreds. Prove it. You know what? I’ll find myself to my new home. See you on stage, loser. See, here in Rap Civilization, when someone challenges you to a rap battle, you have to accept. And now I’m going to destroy that jerk of a guard in a rap battle. I don’t know where all this confidence came from, but I like it. I don’t know which one of these houses are empty, but this one looks like no one lives here. You know what? This will be my new home. This is quite the upgrade from my last place. And hey, I got iron js now. These are sick. Holy crap. I’m at over aundred followers already. How did that even happen? I I got to check the TV. If you’re tired of overpaying for a laggy Minecraft server, Ladies and gentlemen, a fresh new rapper just roasted a guard, and he has challenged that guard to a rap battle tonight. Let’s see what skills this new MC has. This is crazy. If I win this rap battle tonight, I could get to 1,000 followers on my first day of being a real rapper. I better get to the stage. All right, folks. We got the newest rapper verse an average everyday guard facing off. Since they’re both new rappers, they each get 30 seconds to show their skills. Only one round to pick a winner. You, Cakeman. What’s your rapper name? Rapper name? Uh, I didn’t know I get to pick one. Let me think. How about Little Sprinkle? All right, Little Sprinkle Verse. What’s your rapper name? Steak. All righty. Little Sprinkle Verse. Steak. Steak. Take the stage. Your 30 seconds starts now. [Music] Sprinkles on your head looking real weak. I’m flexing on these haters while you can’t speak. A talking dessert. I guess that’s unique. You can barely rap. No technique. You do not impress me. There’s icing on your head. Freaking sprinkles on your toes, bro. You got no followers. I got boat loads. You diss me in public, that’s a low blow. Thanks for the free win. Thanks for the free promo. You’ll cry in a corner while I’ll be taking photos. [Music] [Applause] All right, Little Sprinkle, your first public rap battle. Your 30 seconds starts now. Yo, I’m Little Sprinkle. I just learned to rap steak over here. He’s goofy and whack. He bullies the voiceless. He’s mean and he’s fat and a big honking nose. I mean, look at that. I’m a dessert, but you’re named after me. Sprinkles on my toes. There’s sausage on your feet. You’re the one to cry after this defeat. I’ll battle you any freaking day of the week. Yo, the name’s Derp, but you can call me Sprinkle. You know I stay on top like salt on a Pringle. Diamond on my neck. Got the mobs trying to mingle. TNT your house. Now your house got a dimple. [Applause] What an incredible first performance from Little Sprinkle. Judges, who is the winner? I vote Lil Sprinkle. I’d say Stake wins this one. Y’all both mid. Can I vote? No. Uh, this hasn’t happened before. Does that mean it’s a tie? I guess so. Y’all are trash, dog. Okay, folks. I suppose we leave this as a tie. Congrats to both rappers. That’s a wrap. This ain’t over, kid. You best watch your back. Nah, you watch your back. You couldn’t even beat me. And it was my first performance. No wonder your day job is being a guard. Steak’s going to be the rap king. And you just made the worst enemy of your life. Cupcake. Did you just talk in the third person? Steak out. Watch it, Lil Crumble. It’s Lil Sprinkle, scumbag. Don’t forget the name. Well, even though that was a tie, it felt like a win to me. I gained a ton of followers and I felt like a real rapper on stage. If I could make a good first song, I could get to 1,000 followers. But before I get too ahead of myself, I have to find out what it’s like being a real rapper. I’ve never been able to explore the city like this. Let’s see if I can get some food. I am starving. Hey yo, what the flip you think you’re doing? Uh, just getting some food. What’s the problem? You can’t shop here unless you got 1,000 followers. Scram sprinkle. What? That’s messed up. I’m a rapper. I don’t make the rules. Since you’re new here, here’s a cheat sheet. Okay, thanks. And my bad. There’s a bread dispenser outside. That’s all you can get till you level up. Thanks for the help. I’ll see you around. This is weird. I thought now that I’m a rapper, I can pretty much do whatever I want. I didn’t realize followers were that big of a deal. Let’s see what’s in this book. 1K followers gets me access to stores and rap dungeons. What’s a rap dungeon? 10K followers gets me Golden Jay’s. Oh, that’s what all the famous rappers wear. 50K followers and you get a mansion. 100K followers and you get free music videos. And top rank, you become the rap king. All right, step one. I got to get 1,000 followers. Let’s make a song. [Music] No time for these haters. I’m Mr. See you later. I’m a baker baking cake. I got icing. I got layers. I’m a player, get played, boy. I don’t play no games, boy. Follow words and fame, boy. My rapping is like flames, boy. Dang, that’s not bad so far. I bet I could finish the song by tomorrow. Uh, hello. What are you doing here? Wait, you were my first follower from the dirt field. I’m Ekko. When I heard you rhyme in the dirt field, it gave me hope. Please teach me how to rhyme. I can’t be a voiceless for one more day. I’m going to go crazy. Anyone can be a rapper. And everyone deserves to have a voice. I’ll teach you everything I know. You know what? Come back here tomorrow when you’re done in the dirt field and I’ll start training you. Thank you so much. See you then. Derp’s got a little girlfriend and she’s a voiceless. I bet she’s breaking the law speaking. I’m going to get to the bottom of this. The only thing that matters around here is how many followers you have. Shouldn’t there be more to life than just fame? From now on, I’m not going to rap just for followers. My raps are going to spread messages. Wow. I guess last night’s rap battle is still gaining traction. Over halfway to my first thousand followers. I’m going to explore this city more while I work on releasing my song. We all got a voice and everyone can use it. Followers and fame. There’s more to life than music. Hold up there, buddy. You’re the new cake rapper, right? Sup? I’m Lil Sprinkle. Who are you? My name is Brutus and you got to chill with those bars. What? Why? I’m making my first song. Dude, you got a lot to learn about how things work around here. You’re basically dissing every rapper’s lifestyle with those lines. Yeah. And I’m spreading a message through my music. With that mindset, you’re going to end up in the pit. Just trust me on this. Conform to the system and follow the trends. Don’t try being a hero. Uh, thanks for the advice, but I think I’m going to do my own thing. Your funeral, cake boy. That was concerning, but the dude sounded like he had a few screws loose. Brutus got some screws loose. Sounding like a goof goof. Nobody to prove to. Making my own moves, dude. Let’s go. I’m getting better by the minute. If I could become the new rap king, I could give every voiceless their voice back. But first, I’m going to make sure Ekko learns to rap and get her voice back. I’m really nervous, Derp. I hate breaking the rules. Rules are meant to keep people safe. This no talking rule is meant to keep you feeling hopeless. It’s not right. But if I get caught, I’ve heard terrible things about the pit. You won’t get caught. Besides, this is my house. It’s not like somebody’s going to come barging in here. Now, try to clear your mind. Let me teach you how to ride. You really got to feel the beat. Sometimes when I get in the zone, words just come out and it flows. Okay, but where do I start? Start with whatever you want to tell the world. I hate being voiceless. Voiceless is hard to rhyme. You have to pick an easier word to rhyme with. Life doesn’t feel real. I hate how you feel. Too poor for a meal. That’s it. You just rhymed, Ekko. You did it. This is the voiceless girl guard. We got to take her away. She’s been in here talking with this cake rapper. She hasn’t said a word. Get out of my house. We heard her from outside. Genius. You voiceless, wordless scum. Come with us. No, you you can’t. She This can’t be real. How did Stake even know about her? Was he really that salty that he didn’t win the rap battle? I told Ekko she wouldn’t get caught. What have I done? I don’t care about that stupid song I was making yesterday. I’m making a song for Ekko and then I’m going to find a way to save her. Voices and echoes. I can’t seem to let go. Lost my only chance. Now it’s leaving me a mess, though. Tear my heart apart. I was cursed from the get-go. Now I’m in the shadows with my voices and echoes. He’ll get what he deserves. He’ll regret it. I’ll make him burn. He won’t forget it. Stake, watch out. You can’t prevent it. You made me mad. Now I’m offended. Voices and echoes. I can’t seem to let go. Lost my only chance. Now it’s leaving me a mess, though. tear my heart apart. I was cursed from the get- go. Now I’m in the shadows with my voices and echoes. Wo! I gained over a,000 followers overnight. How did that happen? Who could that be? Did my song somehow go viral? Dude, I tried warning you about going against the system. Why didn’t you listen? This little bit of clout is not going to be worth it in the end. What are you talking about? I thought music was meant to express ourselves. How can I share my emotions through music if I’m forced to be a certain way? Where did you learn that kind of weak mindset, homie? This world ain’t about music. It’s about rap. Rap ain’t meant for the sappy stuff. It’s about being cool and rich. It’s about dissing your enemies and showing that you’re a thug. And who decides that? I can rap about whatever I want. Why do you care anyways? The rap king decides that if you’re the rap king, you can set the rules. But you’re a nobody with barely 1,000 followers. And I care because I don’t want your fate to be doomed, gang. My fate? I don’t believe in fate. I make my own future. Thanks for the advice, but I’m going to do my own thing. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Why do I always feel like I have to go against the system? I seem to always make choices that makes powerful people angry. But you know what? I don’t care. Rules are meant to be broken. And now that I got a thousand followers, I can try my first rap dungeon. I got to go see what they’re all about. So basically, whoever has the most followers instantly becomes the new rap king. That doesn’t seem to make much sense, but that makes things easy for me. All I have to do is keep going viral, and then I can free Ekko from the pit. I can change all the rules of rap civilization. If I become the king. Wow, now I have over 2,000 followers. How are people even finding my song? Oh no, what does Stake want now? Yo, Pipsqueak, you think you slick boy? Releasing some girly lame song just cuz I hurt your feelings. You ain’t never gonna get more followers than me, so just give up. You think I care about getting more followers than you? I’m gonna become the new rap king. You’re nothing to me. Rap king, your bars are trash, homie. Most people are just following you out of sympathy. And don’t think I didn’t hear your little sneak diss about me. I already got your puny little girlfriend taken care of. Do I got to take care of you, too? Is that a threat? Nah, bro. It’s a promise. Just keep me out your lame music. This is your only warning. What a jerk. It’s like he gets amusement from destroying people’s lives. Whatever. I can’t let him affect me. It’s time to go through my first rap dungeon. Hopefully, this isn’t dangerous. Welcome to the rap dungeon. In this dungeon, there will be a series of rooms that will have various challenges. Being a rapper isn’t just about knowing how to rhyme. It’s about being tough, being persistent, doing hard things, and thinking quick on the spot. This dungeon is a test. If you pass, you get rewarded. If you fail, you go to the pit. Wo! Go to the pit? That means I could fail on purpose to get to Ekko. But if I do that, who knows how I would help her escape. And then I would never have the chance to become rap king. I think I need to beat this dungeon and become the rap king. Then I can free Ekko and help all the other voiceless. This room kind of reminds me of the dirt field back when I was voiceless. I wonder what I’m supposed to do. I don’t even have any tools. Wait, what the heck? That’s a zombie. What is a zombie doing here? I did not think the rap dungeon would be this dangerous. Okay. Okay, I need to craft a sword and hopefully not die. I only have three hearts, so if I get hit like two or three times, then I’ll be cooked. Come on. Two pieces of wood. Stay away from me, zombie. Let me just quickly craft a sword and then murder you. This is insane. What does killing zombies have to do with being in a rap dungeon? Okay, hurry. Almost got a sword. Oh no. Crap. I got hit. Die, you stupid zombie. This reminds me of something for some reason, but I can’t quite remember. Well, that was a little scary. Another one. Where are these zombies coming from? Ah, you stupid zombie. Oh my goodness. They just keep spawning every time I kill one. I cannot get hit again. I have no food in here, so I won’t be able to regenerate. Okay, that was a little terrifying. Room one complete. On to the next room. The floor is lava. Good luck. Parkour. Who do I look like? Fbo. I suck at parkour. Well, I definitely can’t mess up. Kate doesn’t do well near lava. One block at a time. This shouldn’t be too bad. What the Who is that? Wait, that looks like my dad. Dad, turn around. Darn. He must not have heard me. I got to catch up to him. But what would my dad be doing here? I haven’t seen him since well, I don’t know. I’m actually really confused now. And just like that, he’s gone. That was so weird. Now that I’m thinking about it, I really have no memories outside of being here in rap civilization. It’s like I know I wasn’t born here, but I don’t know where I came from. But I know for sure that that was my dad. Who knows? Maybe all this heat around me is making me hallucinate. I think I just need to get to the next room. Speaking of which, I don’t think I was told how many rooms there are. I don’t know how many more challenges I can handle right now. Well, at least I didn’t burn alive. Room two complete. Halfway done. Okay, so that means there’s four rooms in total. Let’s see what this room’s about. What rhymes with coal? This sign says roll. Well, yeah, duh. Coal and roll. That rhymes. Let’s see what this other sign says. Mold. Hm. Cole mold. That’s close, but roll rhymes way better. I guess I’ll pick this one. All right, I guess I passed. What rhymes with zombie? Okay, that’s a little tougher. This one on the left says mommy. Zombie. Mommy. I mean, that sounds like it rhymes. Let’s see what the right one says. Abbercrombie. I’ve never heard of that word in my life. Abbercrombie. Zombie. Zombie. Abbercrombie. It definitely sounds better than mommy zombie. Here goes nothing. Freestyle for 30 seconds. Ready, set, go. What the heck? Freestyle? I’ve never truly freestyled like this before. Here we go. Yo, I’m going through this dungeon. I keep my circle small, kind of like a bunion. Uh, I’m always on the move. I think I’m getting bunions. I got layers to myself. Make you cry. No onion. Dang. Name’s Lil Sprinkle. My wrist look like icing. I’m just trying to rap. Trying to think of the right thing. This is off the top. I don’t need no writing. I’m fly in the shadows. Yeah, my name is Nightwing. It’s like I got some powers. I could do this for hours. I got cake for trousers. I stay on top like some towers. Um, am I done yet? It’s been like an hour. Freestyle completed. On to the final room. Dad, how did you get here? Why are you in a cage? Everyone knows all the best rappers are ruthless. They get violent when they need to. Your final challenge. Execute your father. Just do it, son. This is my fate. I am not playing this game. This isn’t rap. This is pure evil. You have 10 seconds to make your choice. I said no. Let my dad go. Room failed. Enjoy the pitch. No, please. Dad, this can’t be happening. Why would they try to make me hurt my dad for a rap challenge? How does that prove anything? So, this is prison. All the innocent voiceless. This is horrendous. I need to think of a new plan. And I need to find Ekko and make sure she’s okay. Well, well, well. Look what the dungeon flushed out. A soggy cake in the pit. This just made my day. Steak, why are you here? I’m a guard genius. Got pit duty today. Saw you entering the dungeon and knew you choke. You’re not a real rapper. You’re weak, dog. I’m weak? Look at you. You trash others cuz deep down you know you’ll never be good enough. Excuse me. Listen, sprinkle trash. I owned you when you were voiceless. Now you’re even worse off. The pit’s going to crush you. It already wrecked your lame little girlfriend. She’s not my girlfriend and she’s definitely not lame. She’s braver than you’ll ever be. Where is she? Like I tell you, I’m getting extra shifts down here just to make your life more miserable. Oh, and here’s your daily gourmet meal. See you around, Lil Crumb. Rotten flesh. I’d rather starve. I need to find Ekko. But first, I need some sleep. Morning, sleepy head. Your job’s simple. Mine until your pickaxe breaks. I’ll give you an extra durable one, so you’ll be at it all day. Have fun. What a dirt bag. Okay, first I have to find Ekko. I really hope she’s okay. How useless can one prisoner be? Haven’t I warned you to not take breaks? Hey, didn’t you ever learn to never hit girls? Don’t ever touch her again. That punch almost tickled. You’re going to regret that, buddy. Stop. Leave him be. I’ll take his punishment. Isn’t that heroic? Maybe both of you need a lesson. Let me handle these two, bro. I’ve been waiting to get my hands dirty. Fine, but you owe me a pizza for this. I was just about to have fun. Find a guard on your first day. You’re weak and have no brains. You know, stake, I’ve been thinking. Shocker. Didn’t know you had the brain cells. Doesn’t it drive you crazy that we ended our rap battle with a tie? Those judges were bozos. Even a voiceless would say I deserve to win. Then prove it. Let’s have a rematch. Too bad you’re rotten in the pit forever. And stop trying to distract me. I’m about to beat you up. Wouldn’t a rap battle be more fun? You humiliate me on stage, gain a ton of followers, and still get to torture me later. You’re just trying to get out of beating, aren’t you? Maybe. Or maybe you’re just scared I’d beat you in the battle. Scared of you? You’re worse than TR, dog. Then prove it. One battle. If I win, Ekko and I go free and she becomes a rapper. If you win, we stay here forever and you get all the clout. I can’t just free prisoners, genius. I’m not the rap king. Oh, I know you’re not, but I’m sure the judges would allow it for a good show. I’ll ask around. Don’t think I’m doing this for you. I just want to edge you on stage. Ekko, are you okay? I can’t believe that guard hit you. I’m fine. I’m stronger than I look. But I thought I’d never see you again. How’d you end up here? I failed a rap dungeon. They tried to make me kill my own father. What? You refused to kill your dad and they sent you to the pit? That makes no sense. I know, but I’m going to get us both out of here. I know I can beat Stake in the rap battle. We need to get to work before we get in trouble again. Let’s just mine and talk. I’m the reason you ended up here. I’m sorry, Ekko. I should have been more careful. It’s okay. Using my voice was worth it. And I’ve been silently rhyming here. I can actually rap now. It’s the only thing that gets me through the days. I knew you could do it. Anybody can rhyme. Some people, they just need a little practice. I’m going to become the new rap king and completely change the system. First, just focus on defeating Stake. Both of you seem confident in winning. He’s arrogant. He doesn’t stand a chance. Just wait till you hear me destroy him on stage. Finally, everyone else finished mining hours ago. My arm is so tired, but my voice is just getting started. It’s your lucky day, chump. A rap battle just got cancelled today. So, the judges agreed for us to have the battle tonight. Tonight? I just worked all day. I’m so exhausted. Always excuses with you. You want to battle me or not? I bet you did this on purpose. Battling me when you know I’m tired. But fine, I’ll still destroy you. Let’s get that voice’s girl so she can see you get destroyed on stage. Derp, what’s happening? The rap battle. It’s starting soon already. Yep. Stake wanted to battle me while I’m exhausted. Pathetic. I don’t need any advantages. Your bars are trash, homie. Now, let’s go. I’m ready to spit some heat. This is my chance to get some real attention. If people know I escaped the pit just for my rap skills, I’ll go mega viral. And from there, I can do something crazy to get the most followers. Maybe even challenge Kanye Chess to a rap battle. I feel like I can do anything now. This is your moment. No distractions, no fear. Show the world your rap skills. You bet. And then you’ll be a real rapper, too. Let’s do this. Ladies and gentlemen, we got an interesting rap battle tonight. Jake and Little Sprinkle had a rap battle the other day and tied. Since then, Little Sprinkle was sent to the pit. If he wins this battle, he is free from the pit. If he loses, he goes back there forever. Steak, you go first. Each rapper has one minute. Let’s rap. They call me steak cuz I stay with the beef. Last battle went easy. Now I’m turning up the heat. Little sprinkle over here. He got locked in the pit. Now he wants to break free, but I know he’s going to quit. You moldy. You crunchy. You ugly. You gross. You lonely. You spongy. You clumsy. You broke. You stupid. You goofy. You lame. A joke. You putrid. You loopy. Your brain’s a joke. I’m like a skeleton boy. I got a bone to pick. Cry me a river. Build a bridge and get over it. You talk big, but your bars never holding stick. I spit heat while you’re colder than a frozen pick. You haven’t won a battle, still ain’t got a kill yet. I’ve been working in the stew. Up on my skill set. You want to rematch. Here it is. Thrilled yet. Burn to bring a shield. I’m swinging with the real threat. You acting real shaky. Haven’t stood still yet. Try to climb ranks, but you haven’t hit a hill yet. Yeah, boy. I’m steak. You know I’m the real deal. You eat rotten flesh. You ain’t had a real meal. [Music] What an incredible performance. It’s going to take a miracle for a little sprinkle to do better than that. You have 1 minute. Wrap. Sizzle on the mic. Watch me flip this plate. I’m sweet and I rise. You just sit there and wait. My flow is like water. I precipitate. Mr. stake I’m about to obliterate. Crowds on my side. Hear them chant my name. I’m young, wild, free. Yeah, I can’t be tamed. You’re old, dumb, and broke. Man, we ain’t the same. You’re fat. Yeah, I’m lighter cuz I’m spitting flames. Checkmate, checkmate. Quit for it’s over. Don’t make me mad. I might lose my composure. I’m spitting. I’m heating like mythical creatures. Too high up. You can’t see me. My last name is Cena. See it. I’m out. Dude, I left you in pieces. Even after I warned you, you could have retreated. You wanted the hard way and now you’re deleted. You thought I was done, but I’m back for some vengeance. I already won, but I’m reaching transcendence. My words are like swords, man. I’m ripping through tendons. Steak wants beef. Oh dear. I’ll turn you to venison. Try me, I’ll pick up my pen again. Bar straight poison. This is not medicine. I stay lit like Edison. Better than veterans. Look at the evidence. It’s all me. You just got served. Medium rare. Golly steak with a side of bread. Soggy. It’s little sprinkle. Don’t forget the name, but especially don’t wear it out. Little sprinkle out. Holy smokes, those bars were hard. Judges, make your final decision. Little Sprinkle is the goat. Free him from the pit. Agreed. Sprinkle boy wins. Steak got coked with this one, chat. Free the cake rapper. A unanimous decision. Well, Sprinkle, you’re the winner. Sorry steak. Maybe stick with being a guard instead of a rapper. you. How did you Being a jerk won’t get you very far in life. I recommend you take a look at your heart and make some changes. That was insane. Derp, you got to teach me everything. It just came to me. Most of that was a freestyle. And now you’re a rapper. How’s it feel? It feels really weird being able to use my voice. I can’t wait to get my first follower. You were my first follower and now I’m your first follower. You’ll get thousands. I know it. No way. I just gained over 20K followers. What? That’s like a million. This rap battle must be going viral. Maybe it’s because everyone saw Stakes sobbing and running off stage. This is the best day of my life. Now I definitely need some sleep. You know, I think there’s an empty house next to mine. We could be neighbors. And hey, I get my golden jays now. So here, have my iron jays. Congrats. Thanks, Derp. Good night. As amazing as this feels, I still have so many questions about the rap dungeon. Is my dad still locked up? How did he even get there? And why did they make me try to kill him? I need answers, but something tells me the only way I’ll get answers is by gaining a crap ton of clout. I think I need to get the rap king’s attention, Kanye Chest himself. But for now, I’m going to sleep good. Oh, hey, I got my golden jays. These look sick. Another 16K followers. This is like getting crazy. I’m low-key getting famous. And I think I have the perfect idea to get the rap king’s attention. A diss track. This the Kanye chest diss track. Mr. Kanye Chest, I got a couple words to say. How are you the king when your head looks that way? You’re bald. What the heck? What happened to your hair? How can you be king when you got poisoned by some nare? A talking cake is dissing you. This your worst nightmare. Nobody is kissing you, but some of us might stare. Not because you pretty. You look like a thumb, bro. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. This thumb is a dumb bow. Never heard you rap, but I know it’s straight trash. All you do is cap. Makes sense. You cap to cover your baldness. Um, sorry, flow, I lost it. Flyer than a comet. Kanye makes me vomit. You want beef boy, I got it. Your mixtape, yeah, sorry, I tossed it. I’ll hit you fast, boy. Kind of like I’m Sonic. Yeah, I got the iron on me. Call me Bionic. This might have been some of the hardest bars I’ve ever written. This will definitely get the Rap King’s attention. Dang, could that be Kanye already? That was fast. Derp, your diss track, that was insane. It’s already going viral. Are you sure you want to make the rap king mad like this? How scary can a dude named Kanye Chess be? Just cuz he has a ton of followers doesn’t make him any different from you and me. I guess you’re right. You’re right. It is going viral. I just gained 11K followers. Darn. I’m still only at one follower. Don’t worry, that was me just a few days ago. It’s crazy how life can change so quick. Move out of the way, peasant girl. Hey, don’t speak to her like that. You You really think you can embarrass the rap king like that? I mean, it’s not my fault you got embarrassed. I was just speaking the truth. Shut up. I know you just chasing clout, trying to milk me for followers, huh? Clearly, it’s working. I just gained 11K. Did you hear that everyone? He gained 11,000 followers. Get a grip, kid. That is nothing. I have a million followers. I’m untouchable. Untouchable, huh? Then I guess a rap battle against me wouldn’t scare you then. There it is with the clout chasing again. You got a lot to learn, kid. You aren’t worth my time. You think I’m chasing clout? I think you’re just scared to battle me. Scared? I could beat you in my sleep. Don’t you dare disrespect the rap king ever again. Or else what? You’ll rap battle me? That’s exactly what I want, loser. See what you’ve done? You’ve caused a scene, Hey guys, give a little cheer if you want me and Kanye Chess to have a rap battle. We start in 3 hours. You’re doomed, kid. Your plan worked. I recorded that whole encounter. It’s going viral on my block gram. No way. It just gained me 25 followers. Smart move. Now the whole world can see how he treats people. I’m going to destroy him. Derp. What if? What if what? He wins. Not a chance. How can you be so sure? He’s the rap king after all. Because I know how people like him think. I know how to get under his skin. He won’t be able to think clearly after my first verse. He’s done. And if the world sees me beat the rap king, they will all unfollow him and follow me instead. And then you’ll be the new rap king. Exactly. Just wait till you see this battle. Ladies and gentlemen, this may be the most epic, intense rap battle to ever take place. The one and only rap king, Kain Chest, agreed to rap battle one of the newest rappers, Lil Sprinkle. Will Kane burn this cake to a crisp? Or will Lil Sprinkle somehow grief this dude’s clout? We will find out now. You each have two verses. Lil Sprinkle, you can go first. 30 seconds begin. Boy, you ain’t a king. You more like a peasant. Leave you all bloody, boy. My bars are like a weapon. You really think you funny, boy? You just dumb and reckless. I’ll cook you like some steak like that roadhouse Texas. All you want is money. Little bit obsessive. You look that creepy looking dude that says my precious. I’ll step into the ring. No better time than present. Does that make you mad? You’re going to get aggressive. I ain’t scared of you. You are not impressive. Call me pathetic, but deep down you’re jealous. I just started rapping and I’ll still leave you breathless. No smarts, no hair. Might as well be headless. This guy straight up disrespected the rack king. Kane, show him who’s boss. 30 seconds. Go. This punny cupcake is going to regret this. Boy, I’m Kanye chess. Turn my haters into fans. Every rhyme I bless. Got this city in my hands. Checking all my stats. I’m the leader of this land. You just talk a lot, but your voice don’t even stand. Ain’t no second guessing. Every battle end like this. Crowd be screaming yes. While you crying in the mist. Go around my neck. Even sunlight want a kiss. Trying to step on me. Better add me to your list. Followers going crazy man. They chanting out my name. Step inside my stage and you never leave the same. Every track I drop is like a fire breathing flame. You a copycat rapper, bro. I invented this game. Dang. He just humiliated Lil Sprinkle big time. This is your last verse, Cupcake. Make it count. 30 seconds. Go. Boy, you must be bluffing. All your bars are nothing. No discussion. Crash out like percussion. All you’re good at is corruption. I don’t think you know me here. I’ll give an introduction. I’m the new king and my crown is really busting. Crowd is on my side. Yeah, they want a new direction. There’s more to life than rap and followers and flexing. Your kingdom’s falling fast. It’s facing disconnection. I’m the glitch in your system. Your royal infection. Deception. Deception. Lies and deception. That’s really all you spread. It’s time for an election. Judges, vote wisely and really pay attention. Step off that throne. Face your own reflection. I don’t know what to say. That was good. Not going to lie, cake boy. But was it good enough to defeat the rap thing? Let him hear it. Mr. Kane says, “What is you doing? I’m snoozing while you’re losing. You don’t stand a chance. I’m a killer with my music. Better every beat I’m a villain. Turn up the heat in the kitchen. Better sit and listen. I got the vision in HD. You get no women. Can’t break me. You cannot stop me. Flow to tsunami. Knock out. I’m rocky. That’s why I’m cocky. Case getting soggy. I’m spicy like Taki. I’m cool like December. Wrist is on frozen. I’m hot like an ember. I found my win, but I did lose my temper. You’re no contender, bro. What’s your gender? Your soft little raps couldn’t even scare geese as I crush every dream on my power increases. I spit one ball and the whole world that freezes your life after this, bro. Rest in pieces. Just wow. I know who I want to win, but it’s all up to the judges. Judge one. You got heart, little squinkle, but I say Kanye wins this one. Mr. Kanye sir, I’m a huge fan, but sorry, I got to say Lil Sprinkle wins this one. Ladies and gentlemen, whoever judged three picks is crowned the winner of this rap battle. Both of you had an incredible performance, but I choose. Derp, you’re finally awake. Thank goodness. I miss you, buddy. You were spitting bars during your coma. You must have had some crazy dreams. Where? Judge three, who did he choose? Uh, I think he’s still out of it. What’s happening? What? Where am I?

Here in rap civilization, rapping is everything. The better you can rap, the more followers you gain. And followers is what gives you freedom. The more followers you have, the better your life gets. Better houses, better treatment, better everything. I was working my way up as a rapper until I noticed some really weird stuff going on…
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Huge thank you to everyone that helped in the production of this movie! Special thanks to the rappers:

Steak: @seasonsxd
Lil Uzi Dirt: @Obed_C
Kanye Chest: Elijahchurneymusic (discord)

And shoutout to @HeroNeeb for making music for the video
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