Stardew Valley Bachelors… But Ranked 🔥 #stardewvalley #letsplaystardewvalley #gaming
Last time we did the bachelorettees. Now let’s rank the bachelors. Elliot is an easy S tier. Lives in a cabin by the sea. Writes you poetry. Looks like he stepped off a romance novel cover. He’s basically Stardew Fabio. On the opposite end, Shane is straight up Dtier. I get the appeal of a redemption arc, but he spends the early game in the saloon smelling like beer and sadness. Even after he soers up, his room is still a disaster. Harvey also gets S tier. He’s the town doctor. Stable actually takes care of himself. and that mustache. I’m just saying the possibilities are endless. Sebastian’s in C tier. He’s the broody, mysterious programmer, but good luck seeing him before 4 p.m. Also, the smoking big nope. Sam is A tier. He’s upbeat, fun, and will literally backflip for you. He’s the kind of guy who turns a boring Tuesday into a pizza party. And yeah, he’s got that golden retriever energy. Loyal, goofy, and always trying to make you smile. And Alex is in Btier. Athletic, confident, easy on the eyes, but yeah, a little self-absorbed. Still, there’s a soft side if you dug deep enough. And of course, we can’t forget about my boy Corobus. Also S tier for obvious reasons. That’s my ranking. Who’s your go-to bachelor?
5 Comments
i will not tolerate shane slander
As a straight dude I feel like Sebastian’s only flaw is smoking other than that he’s the best one
Shane would be the perfect husband if he actually stayed sober!!!!!! All that work of getting him clean and his room is still a mess and he still loves beer… If I could fix him I would 🙁
Krobus is great, but I'm pretty sure he's not technically classified as a spouse
Shane is far too low on this list – once you get past the gruffness he's sweet and a bit dorky. With the drinking it's less "he must be putely sober becauae i can fix him" and more "hes enjoying the one or two drinks but he's not drinking into oblivion and taking it a day at a time". Krobus will always be S tier though