You might ask, why? But I ask, why not?

After many, many hours, and countless runs, I have achieved my sub 5-hour goal to get 9999 poop in Terraria (on a new character / single world / glitchless / no shimmer abuse). I have an encyclopedic knowledge of all things POO in Terraria now so I thought I'd share some wisdom with the community:

• A lot of people probably don't even know how to poop in Terraria, since its not something most people probably do… you just need to have any food buff and sit on a toilet. After a random amount of time (~10s), you will poop (removes the food buff).
• The amount of poop you get depends on the remaining duration of the food buff and the food buff factor (well fed, plenty satisfied, and exquisitely stuffed), the best food for getting poop (BY FAR) is golden delight, which gives a whopping 141 POO.

There's also a lot of changes in 1.4.5 that make pooping easier…

• For example, did you know that if you have the tipsy debuff active, you poop 66% faster!
• Also, if you have negative luck, you get more POO from POOPING, amazing stuff, really.

This is the peak of my Terraria career, but I think I can still go faster…